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February 5th, 2003

12:53 pm

I went out to dinner with Dad last night to a place called Joe's Crab Shack. I'd had several people tell me the food was good and since Dad and I were there and in a mood for something new, we decided to give it a try. Big mistake. Now, if you've been reading the crap of mine for a while, then you know I am boycotting several businesses for various reasons (Please refer to The List of Things That Piss Me Off for details). Well, I am pleased to announce that Joe's Crab Shack is now a proud member of that ever growing list. Oh what a proud day this must be for Joe's.

Joe's Crab Shack is restaurant Hell. Dad and I had the misfortune of learning that Joe's Crab Shack is kind of the seafood equivalent of Chuck-E-Cheese, only without the video games to distract you from all the annoying crap that goes on. When we went in. the first thing that jumped out at me was the fact that every spare inch of the walls and ceiling were covered with Christmas lights. Now, I think a few Christmas lights in a restaurant can be a really nice touch - they make a place a little more festive. But there is only so much festivity that the average person can stand. It was too much and I should have taken the hint and fled the building. So we hadn't been seated 3 minutes when some dork got on the PA and announced a birthday. Then all the waiters gathered around and sang some stupid ass song. Then they all did a lame ass dance through the restaurant that lasted for an entre 4 minute song. And not only did they do this crap for birthdays. They also occasionally did a little dance through the joint just for the Hell of it. It was the most annoying crap I have witnessed in a long time. Dad and I suffered through 3 birthdays and 2 apparently pointless dances. I was so pissed off.

So, what's the deal with these gimmicky singling/dancing waiter places anyway/ Are there actually people who find that entertaining? I just don't get it. It's just stupid annoying crap dripping with insincere sugary cheerfulness. It makes me want to toss my cookies. And not only is it annoying as hell, but there's the added bonus of getting crappy service. Where's the logic in having customers go thirsty through a meal and getting served a luke warm meal that probably sat for 5 minutes because the damn waiter was too busy bustin' a move on the dance floor? Screw that. If I wanted singing and dancing I'd go see a Broadway musical. When I'm having dinner, I want my damn waiter to shut up and refill my Dr. Pepper glass. Is that too much to ask? I think not. And how do they find people to work in these Hell-holes? I don't care how desperate I was for money. I'd starve before I'd work at a place that required me to sing and dance. Some of the waiters at this place actually seemed to be having a good time. I'm guessing they were theatre majors who couldn't find a job after college. And when someone asks what they do for a living, they probably tell people they're performers at a dinner theatre. Yeah, right. I'm telling you, this place was a nightmare.

Oh well, enough bitching for now. My rage has gotten me all grumpy. I don't like having all this rage in me. I need to go cheer myself back up. Have a nice day.