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January 7th, 2003

12:45 pm

So much has been going on, I'll never be able to get totally caught up. As "Nen the Intoxicated Friend" noted on my message board, I have completely bailed on the website now that I have a man. I'm a little disappointed in myself. I never wanted to be one of these annoying chicks that drops everything for a dude and spends every waking hour thinking about said dude. But it has happened. I can't get him out of my head. When I am with him, my happiness is indescribable. And when we're apart, I am still happy but at the same time, I am completely miserable. It defies all logic that I could miss someone so much. I am completely irrational. It's very disturbing. I hate all this emotional crap. I can't think straight.

Never fear, my obsession with the Boob guy hasn't made me completely senseless. I am pleased to report that I was still overcome by rage and disgust upon seeing all the Valentine's Day crap hit the shelves. I have had friends insist that my distaste for Valentine's Day would vanish when I had a boyfriend. Not so. I still think it's a totally lame commercial plot to sell cards, candy and flowers by forcing insincere expressions of love on mindless consumers. I encourage all my readers to boycott this stupid holiday. Valentine's Day sucks. OK, I need to get focused here. I'm just rambling...

Christmas completely kicked ass. I got all kinds of bitchin' stuff and had a blast spending time with family and friends. I went to Tulsa and Oologah to visit all the Grandparents. On Christmas Eve, I went with the Boob Guy to celebrate with his family. Then Christmas Day, I did the Christmas thing with the Parents then had the big Christmas lunch at my Grandma's. It was all great. Meema made up for the weak dressing at Thanksgiving. All the Christmas grub was very tasty.

The Friday after Christmas the parents and I went out with the Whodini's to celebrate Christmas. The Whodini's got me some bad ass flannel bed sheets with cows all over them. They totally rock. They're so soft and fuzzy and warm. The only down side is that I like my sheets so much that I'm having even more trouble dragging my ass out of bed in the morning. I'm so lazy. After exchanging gifts, we went to Buffalo Wild Wings to watch bowl games and chow down on wings and beer. While we were there, I got a sweet little text message on my cell phone from the Boob Guy about how much he missed me. So, I called and convinced him to join us at the bar. I got pretty nervous once he agreed. He hadn't met my parents yet and I was totaly stressed out about it. Like I've said before, me and the Boob Guy are an odd pair and don't really seem like we fit together. It's hard to explain. We just click together. Anyway, it turned out to be a good thing. There was a nice sized group and enough going on where the meeting didn't have to be the center of attention. Everything went fine. My general sense of the thing is that Mom and Dad are probably wondering what the Hell I'm thinking, but at the same time, they're happy as long as I'm happy and the Boob Guy treats me right. That's cool. I can live with that. I also took the Boob Guy over to my Grandma's for a Sunday family lunch. That went well too. He met my Grandma and Aunt and cousin. Really all this meeting the family crap has not been anywhere as traumatic as I had thought it would be. I'm relieved to get it out of the way.

The other major event since my last update is that I finally had surgery to repair the damage I did to my knee back in August when I had the mishap with a tree limb. I had been putting the surgery off because I just wasn't sure it was necessary. But I finally gave in because the pain and swelling was just getting worse despite my efforts to rehab. Turns out that there was a lot more damage to my knee than the Doctor expected. I had a large piece of cartilage floating around that had been completely sheared off by my knee cap. I also had a big section that had gotten flipped and was laying over backwards inside my knee. The doctor took out a shitload of crtilage and also did a partial Lateral release to get my kneecap to move back to the center of my knee where it belongs. My recovery has been going great. After surgery, the doctor told my parents that I'd still be on crutches a week after surgery. But, I felt fine after only 3 days. I stayed on the crutches for 5 days, (kind of -wasn't using them in the house.) 2 days after surgery I felt better than I did beforehand. I can already go up and down stairs pain free and am walking better than ever since the injury. It's great, plus I have some bad ass pictures of my surgery. I've wanted some cool pictures of my insides ever since Mom got pictures of her apendectomy. I'll scan them ASAP for all to see.

The worst part about the surgery was my strange altered mental state due to the pain medication. I hate taking meds. Everything knocks me out and I am very sensitive to drugs. I never want to take them but someone always makes me. This time I took three doses before I couldn't stand it anymore. I was so confused. I was having trouble differentiating between dreams and actual events. I'd remember conversations, but I couldn't always remember who I had been talking to. The wierdest thing happened yesterday. I was talking to Stephanie and she made reference to having dinner with my parents on New Year's Eve (the day after surgery). I had no idea what she was talking about. I didn't remember being there or what we ate or who was there. As she gave me more details, it all started to come back to me a little, but really last Tuesday is basically a big blur to me. I've been told I did and said some strange stuff and that I wasn't making much sense. I just hate losing my head like that. I'd rather have the pain. Next time some damn doctor insists that I need pain meds, I'm just going to have to stand my ground and tell them no. Pain just really doesn't bother me enough to justify making myself completely stupid on drugs.

Hmm, I guess that's really all I have to say for now. I'll leave you with this totally random remark. I love Frosted Mini Rice Chex. It is my favorite cereal du jour and I've been eating 2 to 3 bowls a day. I'm obsessed with this cereal right now. Everyone go get some. It's oh so tasty! Have a glorious day!