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August 15th, 2002

11:18 am

I know, I promised an update on Monday so I could talk about the big party and the return of the Boob Guy. Well, Something happened this weekend that I'm still kind of pissed off about so I've been trying to avoid writing about it while I'm mad. I'm not sure I'm ever going to stop being mad about my latest bonehead move, so I guess I'll just get this over with.
I spent most of Friday and Saturday getting ready for my party on Sunday - lots of cleaning and yard work. So Saturday evening, I did my yard. I was almost done. I mowed, edged etc. My yard was looking sweet. My last task for the evening was to cut up a tree limb that had fallen out of my pecan tree. I was using some long handled limb cutters. I was trying to cut a limb but didn't have enough arm strength to cut through it. So I decided I'd be clever and get a little leverage on the thing. I put one handle of the cutters against my right thigh. Then I used both hands to pull the other handle towards my body. It seemed like a good idea at the time. But what I learned is that apparantly, it is possible to put too much force on the knee joint and instead of cutting the limb, I popped my knee cap out of place. I had to sit down and think about this situation for a minute. As I sat, my knee cap popped back into place, which was a good thing since my knee quit hurting a bit. It really didn't hurt that bad and I sat in the yard for several minutes debating whether I needed to go to the ER. When I stood up and discovered that I couldn't put weight on my leg, I decided there was no avoiing the ER. So I hopped into the house. Fortunately a couple of friends had just come over to help me clean and were inside waiting on me to finish my yard work. So we all piled into the car and I took yet another visit to the ER. This is my third ER visit in four years. I think I might be accident prone.

The ER was pretty efficient. I didn't have to wait very long and was there for less than 2 hours. But otherwise, this was not a very positive ER experience. The doctor was kind of a jerk and I had the meanest nurse in the history of the world. Seriously, he tortured me. I don't know his name, but "Nurse Satan" seems to be an appropriate moniker, so let's just go with that. So, Nurse Satan was putting on my knee brace, and I swear the jack-off was pressing down directly on my knee cap. Also, he kept raising my leg without supporting my foot, so the weight of my lower leg was causing my knee to bend every time he lifted my leg. It was ridiculous. Surely all that pain wasn't necessary. I know he needed to get the brace on right and it needs to be tight, so I was prepared for some discomfort. But the pain he put me through was unreal. And even worse was the fact that he didn't seem to give a rat's ass that he was hurting me. He was a total bastard.

Anyway, Satan got the brace on and they sent me on my way with crutches. I'm getting pretty good on the crutches now and my arm muscles are finally starting to not ache so much. By the time I get off the crutches, my arms and shoulders ought to be pretty buff. I don't know the full extent of the damage I've done to my knee. I'm going to see an orthopedic surgeon later today so I will know more tomorrow. Right now I'm just praying that I won't have to have surgery. The whole thing just pisses me off. It was so stupid. If I just would have thought about it a little I probably could have come up with a safer way to cut that limb. I've been kicking myself all week for being such an idiot. This truly sucks, but I'm trying not to let myself get too down about it. What's done is done and I just need to focus on my recovery.

I did have the party Sunday. It was a nice little bash. I had about 20 people show up and we had lots of hamburgers and hot dogs. We sat out in the yard under the shade of my pecan tree and enjoyed the weather. I had Geri-ball set up and several games were played. Everyone seemed to have a good time. I was pretty much sitting on my ass all night with my leg propped up in a chair. I think some pictures were taken, but I haven't seen them. I'll have to talk to Mom and see if she has any pictures she can email me. I'll put them up here when I get them.

It's been a blast having the Boob Guy drive the bus again. It's amazing to me how the atmosphere on a bus is affected by the driver. For instance, I was able to get along with the last guy and we did kind of become friends. But he had a tendancy to be short tempered with passengers and consequently, he wasn't very popular. You could just feel the hostility in the air. On the other hand, the Boob Guy is one of the most liked drivers in the City. He seems to know everyone and everyone knows him. He's generally cheerful and has a good sense of humor. The mood on the bus is much lighter and pleasant now that the Boob Guy is driving. And this really has nothing to do with the fact that the Boob Guy and I are pretty good friends now. I noticed the pleasant atmosphere on the bus a couple of years ago when the Boob Guy drove another route that I used to ride. This was back before I got to know him and still I thought he was a neat guy. Even though I didn't know him yet, riding the bus was like going into your favorite neighborhood bar. The Boob Guy just has a way of making people feel welcomed and at ease. It's very fascinating to me. He's just a very cool guy and I'm glad to have him for a friend. Damn, I'm getting kind of sappy here. If I was on pain-killers, I'd blame it on the drugs, but I'm just taking Ibuprofin for my leg and I don't think that's strong enough to affect my mental state.

OK, I have one more odd little thing on my mind. I would like to apologize in advance to my more sensitive readers because this is going to be a bit crude. I'd also like to apologize in advance to you OSU fans. It's nothing personal. I just have issues with the OSU mascott, Pistol Pete. Just look at this picture [picture omitted] of the Pistol Pete Bobble head you can buy at McDonalds. See how he's all crouched down to draw his guns? Well, to me, it looks like this bobble head is missing a cow because if that's not an "I'm all ready to have some sex with livestock" pose then I don't know what is. I don't know. Maybe it's just me being nuts and I'm seeing too much here. What can I say. My pervert of a father has warped my mind. Anyway, I really think the OSU marketing people need to rethink Pistol Pete. It's just not right to have a mascott that has a fetish for farm animals.

I guess I'll call it a day. Hopefuly I'll get some good news from the Doc later today. I could really use a little good news. Later.